You Alone

 

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”                   -2 Corinthians 12:9

Throughout this week I’ve faced some personal challenges. The enemy coming at me from all sides trying to bring discouragement and doubt. Begging me to focus on all the problems in my life. Nagging at me to just throw up my hands and say I’ve had enough, it’s too hard, there’s no way out.

But there’s been a louder voice, forcing its way through all of that negative noise…it’s a sweet voice whispering, “I am enough”.  Like His voice in 2 Corinthians that says just that! My grace is enough, I am strong when you are weak.

Our church is finishing up a campaign called “40 days of prayer” by Rick Warren. This last week reminded us to look back at what God has done for us. And even further to look back in His word to see what He’s done in many generations past. Have you stopped to do that lately? To remember a time when God made possible what you believed would never happen? Have you opened His word to read of the countless miracles performed in His name?

I know we’ve all been through storms in life that threatened to swallow us. I can think back to a specific time in my early 20’s when I thought my world was crashing down around me, and I believed there was absolutely no way out. I remember lying in bed one night, heart completely broken, full of shame, not knowing what to do. But as I lie there defeated, God’s voice broke through even if just the faintest whisper, It came in a song that said “come to me you weary one, I will give you rest. Come to me you broken one, I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

I remember a time 6 years ago when my husband had been let go from his job, and we thought there was no way we could pay all our bills. We thought we would lose our home. But God proved Himself faithful again. He took care of us and He made a way where there seemed to be no way.

3 years ago my family and I sat in a hospital room in San Francisco and were certain we were losing my Father in Law to a undiagnosable brain condition. We watched him deteriorating before our eyes, and all I could do was pray peace over the situation. Then I watched as God restored his health. I watched him walk back into his home weeks later. And even though his life will never be the same, I’ve watched him laugh, and love, and live for the past 3 years.

God is faithful. His power is made perfect even in our weakest moments. Especially in our weakest moments!

So as I look at this world around me. As I read story after story of the violence in this world. As I wonder what my future holds, and how I’m going to get there. I’ll look back and remember that my God is for me! I’ll remember His power and goodness. I’ll trust Him because He’s shown me time and time again that He can be trusted. And even when it’s just a whisper, I’ll listen when I hear Him tell me He’s enough.

 

A Beautiful Story

Well, I didn’t expect to be writing a post this week. I thought I would be 3 days post surgery and only able to use one arm. If you’re reading this, then you know that’s not the case. I mentioned in my last post that I was going in for shoulder surgery Monday, but what I didn’t tell you was that my original surgery date was February 5th and it got postponed for unforeseen reasons to March 12th. So you can imagine my shock when they called me Morning to tell me that my surgeon was stuck at the airport in Dallas and they needed to reschedule my surgery yet again, a month down the road.

I want to tell you that I was excited to hear that news, and that I’d enjoy being off for an additional month. But, that’s not what happened. I sat there on my bed and I cried. I cried hard. I’d closed my business in February to prepare for the first surgery date. When that didn’t happen,  I took the time to do everything I could to prepare my body, my mind,  and my home for the recovery process. When I hung up the phone, I cried out “why?” “Are you kidding me?” “I can’t believe this is happening again.” “I’m so confused, I don’t understand what God is doing here.” “Now what am I going to do.”

You see, this bump in the road is causing me to be out of work for longer than I thought. It’s causing me to be in this unknown season for longer than I thought. And I was questioning every decision I’ve made over the last few months.

But here’s where God steps in. He says to me, “OK. You’ve let it all out, I know how upset you are. I know this isn’t what you planned, but let me remind you…”

“I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future.”- Jeremiah 29:11

I can’t tell you how many times God has brought that verse to my mind over the years, but it always puts things back in the right perspective for me. I don’t always get to know the full span of how Gods plan lays out. I don’t get to determine God’s timeline. I’m going to face things that I don’t want to go through. But I can be sure of this, whatever Gods plan is for me (and He has one) IT IS GOOD! His plan for me is good! His plans for you are good!

I was asking God why this was happening. Why He was doing this AGAIN. It’s just a simple surgery, why was He making it so hard to just get done and be on the road to recovery. But this morning as I thought back on my few days of questioning Gods plan, He spoke a very clear truth over my circumstance. He doesn’t MAKE everything in my life happen. Sometimes life just happens, and He allows it. Sometimes we get dealt things in life that seem unbearable, but He allows it. Sometimes other peoples choices cause pain and frustration in our life that we cannot prevent, and He allows it.

I believe that though it’s bizarre and frustrating that my surgery got postponed twice, It’s not Gods fault. But He is allowing it my life because He wants me to know, without a shadow of a doubt that WHATEVER happens, however many times this situation goes the opposite of what I planned, HE IS WITH ME. He’s with me in this prolonged season of waiting. He’s with me in my frustrations and confusion. He’s even with me in my doubt and anger. And He will use this for His GOOD plans for my life.

As a friend reminded me this week, one day this will be a part of my story. One day I’ll look back and understand why. God is not finished writing His beautiful story yet, and I’m choosing to be OK with that. He knows what He’s doing.

“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:9 

“Cause You know what is best,

YES! And you’re not done yet!

All the while you keep saying, trust that I am orchestrating,

everything for good. Everything for good!

All the while you keep saying,

trust that I am custom making, everything for good. “

Greater Things

“For you are indeed good, and your words are truth, and you have promised me these good things. ” 2 Samuel 7:28

This coming week, I am entering into a season that I’ve never walked through before. In January, I found out that I have a shoulder injury that requires surgery. The last time I had surgery was 25 years ago, and I’ve never broken a bone or severely injured myself. So as you can imagine, when I heard the doctor say “you need surgery, you’ll be in a sling for 6 weeks, you can’t work” I was immediately overwhelmed with fear.  I remember that day clearly because it was pouring rain, and as I sat in the car taking it all in, I sobbed just like the sky.

I cried because I am a self-employed hairstylist, I own my business and I was just told I wouldn’t be working for at least 10 weeks. I cried because I was afraid of the pain that was promised to come with this recovery. And I cried as I thought about all the things I wouldn’t be able to do for myself…like wash my hair, brush my hair, get dressed, cook…all these things I would need help to do because I’ll only have my left hand to use for at least 6 weeks. And then after that, everything is slow as you begin physical therapy to gain back strength and range of motion.

All this to say, that for those moments, and even days following I didn’t once stop and think upon the promises I knew in Gods word that said He would help me through this. That this was part of His plan. I didn’t stop to see the prayers that He was answering through this trial. I didn’t stop to see His goodness. All I could think about was what I was going to endure.

Its been about 2 months since I first got this news, and since then, I had to make the choice to close my business because my husband and I couldn’t afford to keep it open while being out of work for 2 months. It was one of the hardest decisions I’ve made, but I knew it was a sacrifice God was asking me to make. I’ve also had to let go of control of some areas in my life that I’ve never had to before and learn to trust other people to do things that I’ve always done on my own. And for the first time in my adult life I will have to let others take care of me, when I’ve always been the one taking care of others.

Through all of this, God has taught me something that I NEVER would have learned if I wasn’t faced with this trial. And that’s where the beauty of this story comes in. GOD HAS A PLAN! He’s had one all along, and He knew I would never grow to where He needed me to grow without the pressure of this situation. And I am right where I’m supposed to be BECAUSE of this situation.

What are you facing today that has you focused on the negative? The loss of a job? A difficult relationship? An injury or illness? Whatever it is, I promise that if you give it to God and surrender your future to His hand, HE WILL BRING SOMETHING GOOD! You can trust His name for greater things!!

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him.” Romans 8:28

You often hear the saying “God won’t bring you to it, if He wont bring you through it.” Well, as I go into surgery Monday, I am choosing to believe this with all my heart. I’ll see the other side of this storm one day, and I will see all the good that is promised to come, and it will be by HIS power and grace that I get there.

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13

“I will not fear, for you are with me. I’ve seen this fight from the victory! No power in hell can stand against me! I’ve seen this fight from the victory!”